Once again?

I have just packed my suitcase. 

Got my passport, booked my taxi for the return late at night from Gatwick, printed out my ticket, separated my make up tools that I want to take with me from the rest but kept them out of the suitcase so I can use them tomorrow, put up a note for the cleaner, stood around in my room for almost two hours trying to decide what to take, compared the temperatures between London and Athens a million times on various websites trying to 'imagine' what a difference of 10 degrees might feel like, contemplated heavily on whether I should take high heels and my black dress to take the opportunity to dress up as well as go on holiday but my holiday self won again so I'm not, I sent out an email to the ones that might wonder where I've gone (my programme leader and my administrator) telling them I'm not going to be on email till Monday night, I put out on the chair the clothes that I'm going to wear tomorrow - chosen on the sole criterion of comfortable-ness - no accessories and soft fabrics, threw the remaining ham and mozzarella in the bin and took the trash out, wondered briefly if I know what happiness is and if I can find it where I'm going this time - or is it only defined as happiness when I'm away from it, when it's part of the past or part of the future?

Do wish me a good trip. I need one. I'll have a kebab in your honour. Or a greek salad facing the Acropolis. 

Friday evening, I am going to experience this

Σύντομα. Πολύ σύντομα.

Αθήνα έρχομαι. 

Έρχομαι Αθήνα.

Σας είπα ότι θα πάω Αθήνα?

Sleep

I am craving for sleep. Real sleep. Nothing that the magic of Athens can't fix. One does not need sleep there. Έρχομαι.

For a change

Today was a good day. Just in case you actually believed I’m only going to be using this blog to bitch, you are wrong (only 1% of the times wrong, but still).

Today was a good day.

I’m exhausted, my brain is fried, my body hurts from beating myself at the gym every day during the weekends to make up for the weekdays that are too busy to allow me to go, I’m uncertain about my concluding sentence in the paper I am about to submit to the editor (long past the deadline), I desperately need a dog for the zillions of tons of affection inside of me looking for a way to get out.

But today was a good day.

The concluding sentence might be crap, but I did finish a paper that’s (almost) publishable. Pilates was great this morning and my body is starting to know and show it. I’m listening to Κατσιμίχες because I got jealous from a friend listening to their song and it makes me happy. My nail polish matches my shoes. The pain of the realization that my support system, my all time favourite people are either gone or going away in a few months, carries with it the sweetness that they’re all faces that will stay in my life forever (WHETHER YOU WANT TO OR NOT, YOU HEAR?). There's a dozen white roses in my fishbowl and my golden frame is ordering me to keep calm and carry on.

Most importantly, today was a good day.

‘And tomorrow is another day’, the elephant, still in the room, says. And I refuse to look at it in the eyes. And Superman will continue to attack the phd monster and its ugly followers with candy and brownies and hugs. And the monster will not be defeated, but it will be tamed and learn how to love.

And hopefully, I’ll soon get a dog.

Tonight

In case it wasn't clear enough last weekend, here it is again. In English this time, to avoid any possible misunderstandings:

It's official. I hate Saturday nights. I hate them, I hate them.

The glass is empty

Bitching time:

1. I'm tired of sitting on this library chair for almost 12 hours now (maybe 10, taking out the loo and food breaks).

2. I'm tired of regretting for the promises I make to various people for various commitments by opening my big mouth and then regretting doing so when it's time to deliver - when, for example, the editors are breathing down my neck to receive the edited version of a paper that the reviewer tore apart, which I now hate and which I almost completely re-wrote, which means that it's probably going to be published without being properly reviewed. Urgh.

3. I am disappointed to realize that my moment of enlightenment from this morning, the realization that I actually figured out my theoretical framework, is something that not only matters s**t to the rest of the world, but something I cannot even EXPLAIN to normal people. Perhaps because it makes no sense really. But, either way, they wouldn't care.

4. I'm tired of everything that's fighting for space in my brain - even when I'm sleeping.

5. I'm still not tired of this blog - my only solution to bitching uncontrollably and without remorse.

Απόψε

Είναι official. Μου τη δίνουν τα σαββατόβραδα. Τα μισώ, τα μισώ.